“To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone, and a funny bone.” Reba McEntire
Forget achievement, in marriage and parenthood these bones are critical for survival! Each of these fragments provides us a defense against the daily disasters life throws our way. If we don’t make sure to exercise them, they won’t be able to bear the weight that stress, worry, and heartache put on us through the years. Unfortunately for us, it doesn’t seem that we get to pick and choose which bone gets a work-out, when.
I think I discovered my wishbone first. I remember playing make-believe with my best friend from the time my memory begins. I was anything from an FBI agent to an astronaut, whatever life I could dream up seemed possible back then. In this never-never land, my imagination ran free; for here in this sacred place of innocence, reality did not trespass. When choosing my pretend profession, I didn’t once think about what salary it would earn, or if it came with benefits. I didn’t worry about whether it would match my 401k. Nope. The only determining factor was what I wanted to do that day. I can still remember how liberating it felt to not be tethered by the restrictions of debt. Oh, how my mind soared! Then, my dad got sick, and my thoughts were grounded. I knew I had to put my wishbone away and find my backbone.
Since I hit puberty, I don’t recall not having a backbone. I have relied on this part of my anatomy figuratively for as long as I can remember. It’s gotten me through unthinkable loss, impossible odds, and unbelievable setbacks. I’ve never taken it for granted and do my best not to under estimate it. I have found that your backbone can’t be broken; it can be stressed, strained, or even splintered, but never broken. We all have experiences that test our backbone, that push us to the limits and then further still. As I visited my friend and her newborn son at the hospital on Sunday, I all but saw her backbone struggling to handle this most trying ordeal. When she held him, I noticed the tell-tale stiffening of her spine and the dogged glint in her eye; he would get through this, she would get through this – no matter what. It’s this fiery determination, this passionate persistence, this obstinate resolution that lends you a strength you never knew before. To some it feels like it comes out of nowhere, just when they need it most; to others they’ve known it’s been there all along. Either way, your backbone is a silent superhero, coming to your rescue when crisis calls. Just as I was getting ready to leave this new mommy, her little guy did something to make her laugh and a smile shone in her eyes. I knew then it was going to be ok, for she hadn’t lost her funny bone.
I often believe that the type of life you live is determined by your ability to maintain a sense of humor. I think the trick to surviving the everyday lies in finding the comedy embedded in the drama. In our house, my sister could sling a one-liner that had us all rolling on the floor in fits of hysterics before the tears had a chance to fall. It’s often these moments I’m most thankful for. Her knack for finding the joke in the somber has always helped me find the silver-lining. I suppose it’s the funny bone that keeps the backbone from burying the wishbone. Lately, I've been getting the feeling that it's time to do a little digging.
Whether it be rousing your wishbone, strengthening your backbone, or tickling your funny bone, you are fortifying the frame that protects your soul. This week, if you’re wrestling with the small stuff or in a battle with something big, and you feel like your backbone is over-worked, you lost your funny bone and a wishbone is nowhere in sight, make sure you let your thoughts take flight; who knows; maybe you will find that amusement is the wind beneath your wings. For sometimes, success (or survival, depending on how you look at it) lies solely in hanging in there until another day dawns. See you in the skies, my friends…
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